Two months from today our Lucy girl will be born! Actually I am writing this at 7:15am so right about now on April 27th I'll probably be getting my spinal and Jon into his scrubs for my 7:30am surgery. It is such a weird thing knowing exactly when your baby will be born. If you would have talked to me yesterday at 7:30am, I would have thought Lucy was coming later that day. Ford woke me up nice and early at 6:30a and Jon was traveling for work so I plopped him in bed with me, put on Bubble Guppies, and tried to close my eyes. As I was making us breakfast I started feeling intense pain in my abdomen. It wouldn't go away so I assumed it was cramping and decided I needed to guzzle tons of water since I just got up. Over the next 30 minutes, things drastically changed and I was basically on the ground sobbing having what I thought was contractions. I couldn't stand, couldn't sit, and Ford was very concerned. My doctor is about 25 min away and opened at 8:30a so I did my best to dress myself and Ford (between holding my stomach during the pain, crying, and trying to coordinate with my sister to meet me there). Like I said, Jon was 3 hours away in Houston, what are the odds, and I could tell he was upset that he wasn't with me. Like a crazy lady who may have been in labor, I drove myself in traffic to the hospital 25 minutes away. There was no way I could have waited on someone to come pick me up and take me, I felt Lucy's head pulsing down on my pelvis and the faster I got to the doctor, the better. I gripped the steering wheel and practiced some breathing that I've seen on TV (I never took a birthing class for Ford) and by the grace of God, I made it safely. As I drove I prayed out loud obviously for this to be false labor but that God's protection would surround me and my baby girl and that His will be done. If is will was for Lucy to be a 31 weeker, then she would be. I know He is sovereign over all and has known Lucy's birthday since man walked the earth, no sob of mine could change that. I prayed that my nerves and anxiety could be replaced with His peace and loving hand. I needed to be strong for Ford, for Lucy, and for myself. Every few minutes Ford would look in the carseat mirror and say "Mama!" and smile at me. What a gift that little boy is and I am still in shock that I am being entrusted with another.
One side note. If you remember my pregnancy and birth with Ford, I never went into labor. I actually don't think I ever had a contraction until Pitocin was cranked up during my induction, barely even a Braxton Hicks. So feeling these pains felt like what I thought was labor. I read so many birth stories that start with feeling yucky and crampy and slowly turn into labor. I had nothing to compare it to and knew I needed to see my doctor asap. I kept thinking, oh great, I have chosen a scheduled C section and I go into labor. What are the odds.
My sister met me there and grabbed Ford as I hobbled into the doctor. They were able to squeeze me in right away with a PA, my doctor is in surgery Thursday and Friday mornings, and I was hooked up to the contraction monitor. It brought back a flood of memories because my week overdue with Ford, Jon and I were in there everyday hooked up to that machine for at least an hour. Funny thing about second pregnancies. I was pretty calm considering I was alone. Jon was 3 hours away and there was no need for him to rush back home until we had answers but the first time mom Ruthie would have been freaking out. If God meant for me to be wheeled into a premature C section alone (again!), then that would be our story. I was glad that no contractions were being picked up since I am only 31 weeks but it was also discouraging because the pain was so intense and happening every 2-3 minutes. They did a cervical sonogram to make sure my cervix wasn't shortening and within 5 seconds of insertion, the PA said, "WOW! That is a big head and big baby." Ouch. My cervix looked thick and long, no reason to worry about labor, but Lucy is sitting very, very low with only a little fluid between her head and my cervix. She also said second pregnancies are a lot more painful because your hips and pelvis may be a little more spread than before, causing baby's head to be really low. I tested negative for a bladder infection (which I was hoping to have so I could explain the pain) so they let me go home saying rest, Tylenol, and heating pad. Womp.
Taking care of an 18 month old isn't exactly the definition of rest so I spent all day and evening at my mom's house until Jon came back into town. I was still having intense pains and the only relief I could get was on my side laying down. I slept for 2 hours and basically sat the whole day. By the time dinner came around I felt 100 times better, but not 100%. I really have no idea what it was but I am very thankful that I sit here today, 8 months pregnant, growing a big and healthy girl. So many thoughts ran through my mind yesterday.... we haven't taken maternity pictures, the nursery isn't done, I have a girls trip next week, and my baby sprinkle is tomorrow! I also cried many tears thinking "what if this was my last day with Ford". I know it's inevitable that Lucy comes but I am not ready yet, emotionally or physically. Knowing that she COULD come at any time (I have friends who have given birth around this time, 31 weeks) I want to spend the next 8 weeks soaking up the sweet moments where Ford is my #1 priority. Jon and I are having so much fun with our little guy, who seems to be learning 20 new words a day, and I know he will still be just as cute when she arrives, I will just be twice as busy. I keep telling people that you kind of forget a baby comes after pregnancy, especially when it is not your first and you have other kids taking up all of the space in your brain. This pregnancy has proved to be a lot harder than Ford's which I couldn't have ever expected. I should have known it was a girl, she's already giving me a run for my money.
I realize this post is getting long and drawn out, I just had to write down some of the emotions I was feeling today after such a weird day yesterday. Not sure what I would do without family close by or my faith knowing that God's sovereignty is supreme in every part of my life.
So Lucy Joy, please keep cooking. We will see you April 27th!