Thursday, August 2, 2012

Roots

Tuesday night was incredibly special for me to experience with my husband, right up there with watching him get baptized. It was a precious experience that not many other people have, and I pray that they don't have it.

Jon's dad passed away 3 years ago in July, it was the morning of our first date. I never got to meet him  and Jon had just begun telling me about him the week before he passed. He died of a heart attack but suffered many other things prior so we have peace knowing he is no longer in pain. If you know anything about Jon, you'd know he has a love of cars. He knows more than you can imagine about cars...new ones, old ones, engines, transmissions, makes, models, years. I love driving by old cars and Jon will tell me the exact year (because yes there are difference between the 66, 67, 68, and 69 mustangs people!). And it all stemmed from his dad. Jon's dad was disabled from a work accident and retired by 33 so the memories Jon has of him aren't outside playing catch or wrestling in the living room. They are of cars. Riding in the backseat of his dad's mustang, helping him in the garage, and going to quarter mile drag races. Jon's favorite smell is exhaust, and he has his dad to thank for this one.

Tuesday night I finally understood the root of Jon's love for cars when his dad's 87 mustang was delivered from Ohio. 


I can't even begin to describe Jon's face as tears welled in his eyes. It is a moment I was lucky enough to capture with my camera but will forever remember in my mind. 


Jon's best friend, also Jon, who grew up with my Jon in Cleveland and now lives in Austin, was there with us. Jon N. told us he has been waiting to drive this car since he was in 6th grade. These two boys were giddy.


I don't know much about cars (but I am learning!) but this one is very powerful. Jon's dad did lots of work on it and the truck driver was so impressed!! The car has a V8 Cobra engine, which supposedly is pretty crazy. And it is LOUD!!!!!!! I always hated guys with loud cars trying to show off in high school but now we have the loudest thing I've ever heard in our garage :-). 

Jon plans on building a Shelby Cobra kit car or a fastback Mustang transplant with his dad's car (we weren't lying on House Hunters!). Jon has been planning on getting his dad's car for years and we finally have the space for it in our new home. So we are now a 3 car family and I have no idea how to drive the Mustang. Thinking about driving a manual stresses me out! 

Jon's stepmom and grandpa filled the car with lots of Jon's dads things and Jon's things from growing up. Jon's dad was named Robert, Robbie or Bob for short. They sent his old Air Force uniform, letter jacket (he was a swimmer) and letter sweater, old Browns hats, model cars, and best of all..the Hart family guns. We had previously owned 3 guns but now we own 6. And one of them is all mine!! I am now the proud owner of a 22 pistol, passed down from many generations of Harts. The two others are a shot gun and rifle. I plan on keeping the shotgun handy in case we have intruders when Jon is gone...just the sound of cocking it is frightening!

Our house is protected by the Lord and guns :-)
We do not shoot game, just for fun FYI



Last night was emotional for both of us. I cried watching my husband light up, but I also cried for my father in law. It is selfish for me to say I am sad I didn't meet him because one day, I will be reunited with him in the ultimate paradise. I am sad that my husband doesn't have a father, but I am happy he considers my dad his own. I am sad my children won't have a grandfather on his side, but I am happy we have so many people that will love our babies. Jon will be the first to tell you his father was not perfect, but those imperfections have taught him how to be a father to Ernie and to our future children. 

Last night Jon told me when he looks down at his hands, he sees his dad's hands. I think he has his dad's nose and mouth (and awesome full head of hair).

I'm not sure how this came to be but after Tuesday night, I find myself aching for a son. Because Jon doesn't have a father, part of me thinks I want to fill that hole in his life with a baby boy. One that looks like Jon and Robbie. I pray that the Lord gives us a son sometime in the future, who will get to play with Jon's childhood toys we now have.


I know this post is getting lengthy but I do want to mention something about in laws.  I will be the first to say it is nice not having to share holidays between families. I think I've said before that we are not close to Jon's mom. I met her once, a few years ago and Jon talks to her about once a year so we get to spend all the holidays and special occasions with my family, which is perfect and what I love. It would make me sad not waking up at my parents house on Christmas or spending Thanksgiving at their house but I don't really have a choice. Yes in laws may be pesky, over bearing, and give constant advice, but be lucky you have them. Let them know that you are thankful for them the next time you see them. Do it for me?

So the experience I pray that you don't have is losing a parent. Don't take for granted any conversation you have with your loved ones, you never know when it will be your last. Though he may not be here physically, I am getting to know my father in law through clothing, photos, guns, and his special car. 

32 comments:

Amanda said...

I am so unbelievably happy for both you and Jon! I am so excited that he know has that car in his possession among some other amazing items of his fathers! :) I've sad it before, but I'm just so happy for you!

Christa @ the meandminebook said...

What a beautiful story.
The emotion was all over his face, wasn't it??
Wow. So glad you caught it on camera.

Kayla fromSealedWithAKay said...

Oh my goodness what a lovely post! I'm over here in tears though- it is amazing how memories are stitched into items, and how great it is that you share in those with your husband! It is so hard losing someone close to you, especially someone you admire and look up to so much! What a great wifey you are to share in that with your husband!

xo Kayla

Sandra said...

The last two paragraphs really brought the tears on. I am so blessed to still have my parents and now have my boyfriends parents. They are the most godly people I have ever met. They are truly an inspiration.

Elle said...

this post made my day. jon has great taste in cars. i have a GT mustang. and i'm also planning on restoring a car, debating between a shelby kit car and a 65 or 67 fastback. i got my love of mustangs from my family too.

Nikki said...

Thats awesome that you got to witness such a special moment for John. My friend has a GT Shelby 4.6L its a BEAST!

Calderman said...

So glad you posted this story. Bob was an amazing person. He was there for me and my husband when we were getting married when no one else was, and really made it a point to show us he cared. We miss him dearly. I'm glad that Jon has the car now. I remember growing up seeing it in his garage every time we went over there for holiday's. He was always in the garage working on it when we got there. Tell Jon to take good care of the car. There are lots of memories there.

Cori H. said...

That is so awesome that Jon finally has his dad's old car and some of his most treasured items. It's also special for you because you get to learn more about the man you never knew. I love how you captured the expression on Jon's face! I gotta say that I also love the picture of you, the guns, and the crosses. You are fully protected, girl! haha! Love this blog post!

Lacey_Renea said...

Wow, this brought all kinds of tears to my face!

What a wonderful thing for you to experience with your husband!

Allison said...

Wow Ruthie! You wrote that so perfect and really put things into perspective. I am so happy that Jon has all of the memories he has! You two are such an amazing couple!! Can't wait for the Hart babies!!!

Emilie said...

Wow - that really brought the tears to my eyes. Your faith and strength are inspiring and this message is something I will reflect on. Thank you.

Finding your blog came at the perfect time, and it has been great for my new journey into marriage and faith.

Crystal said...

I'm a new follower, found you from Hollie's blog. I can understand this connection that Jon had with his Dad. Little different but my ex-husband turned me onto mustangs, he had several fox body styles like the 87 that Jon's Dad and now you all have. I bought a brand new 07 mustang and lost her about a year ago after hitting ice one morning on my way to work. I think it's awesome that Jon can see a car and be reminded of his father even now that he is gone. It sounds like he cherishes that and that you are very supportive! Great post!

Daisy said...

What a special post Ruthie. I lost my dad at a really young age so I know how life changing that is. As much as I wish my husband could have met my dad I get to tell him stories about him. It's always nice when your spouses family embraces you. RJs dad is like my dad and I thank God for that.

GingerPeachT said...

Wow what an awesome experience to have gone thru. So happy he was able to gain all of that to remember his daddy. :-)
Love the guns and crosses pic haha
I know I should be thankful for my inlaws, but it's hard in my situation as they have talked bad about me behind my back. One of these days I hope they can fully love me and I them.

Beauty Follower said...

Nice sunglasses.
Have fun!

Erin said...

How sweet, what a neat experience. Girl, just reading your words made me tear up a little bit! So so special.
And ps - loving the guns! ;)

Lauren H. Edmondson said...

so sweet, it's nice that he shares fond memories and a hobby with his dad.

and I love "Our house is protected by the Lord and guns" haha!

Mallorie Owens said...

This is so special he was able to do this! Dave is the same way with his Dad in a lot of ways you mentioned above and especially the car thing. His Dad is a master mechanic so he definitely got his love of cars from his Dad too. :)

Krista said...

This is so cool, what an awesome moment for Jon. And you too. My Hubsy's father passed a little over 10 years ago and though I did meet him he was a man of few words. I feel sad too that my boys don't get to know him. L has some of his navy memorabilia in his room and I like to remind him that he will indeed get to meet Pappap one day in heaven.
I think I may have learned just as much from his things as the little he spoke while here. I'm so glad you get to at least have these small physical reminders of him. They can provide such a nice sense of connection while you wait to meet him in heaven.

Hooray for Jesus and guns ;)

Nikol Schiller said...

I love that Jon sees his dad's hands when he looks at his own. I can definitely relate. My mom passed away when I was pretty young and I can hear myself saying things that she used to say. It's amazing how our parents stay alive in our lives even when they're not here with us. What a sweet post, Ruthie.

Amanda said...

This is my favorite post of the day! I love the story, the emotions, the healing. I'm a Texas gal too, and our house is protected by the Lord and guns as well - and we also don't hunt! :)

Maybe I'm the bazillionth (I like to make up words) person to tell you this, but you look like a brunette Kristin Chenoweth to me. That means you're GORGEOUS! :)

Sarah said...

I love this post! Jon sure looks like a happy man and you can see the true excitement in his eyes when he is checking out his dads car! That is so awesome. You are giving him more then he can ask for by being such a wonderful wife and awesome mom to Eernie! My husband doesn't have a mother or father either so I know the pain you feel for your husband all too well. Luckily he has your family to smother him in love just as my husband does. He is lucky to have you!

xoxo

tiff@thecoffeehouse said...

oh man Ruthie ... such a tough but beautiful post to read. and lengthy? I don't think there is one part of this you could have cut out. it was perfect and much needed. It's ironic that I posted about my grandparents being alive and then came over to your post. It was tough to read and it makes me even more thankful for what I do have. It sounds like Jon's dad was one amazing guy (duh, look at Jon!). Ok, now my comment is getting lengthy. LOVE the car!! And Jon's glasses. :)

Amanda C. said...

I think it is awesome that Jon has these things to connect him to his father. I lost my mom in a car accident when I was 17 and sometimes I am sad that C never got to meet her. You are right, no one should take their family for granted.

Girls Love Fried Pickles said...

First, is he going to be able to get his calves in that car? Second, now i become serious. A philosophy that i live by. Don't let your past dictate your future. A persons obstacles provide their character but do not tell who they are. I tell this to people often. Jon is a good man for which his heart gives and receives love. Our hearts take in those memories and release them a little at a time to be closer to those we have lost. I send you both big hugs.

In This Wonderful Life said...

What a special post, Ruthie! You are an amazing wife and Jon seems like a wonderful man! I cannot imagine the loss of a parent. These are wonderful memories that he will always be able to have. I'm sure his dad is SO thankful you are gal he married :) xo

{[Jessica]} said...

I am so happy for you both!! what an amazing post and you are truly a special wife. You both are always so supportive of each other!! Just remember, that his father is watching from above and is being your guardian angel. :) I pray that his father will become your future sons guardian angel as well!! :) May God continue to bless you both.

Happy Thursday

Simply Splendid LOVE said...

I love how real and honest you are. What an amazing moment and how cool to have those pictures as memories in the future. It's so cool he'll get to continue his dad's hobby. What a tragic loss to loose a parent, but how cool that he has such wonderful in laws to call parents. That's so sweet to wish for a son for him.

Alana said...

Oh gosh, Ruthie. How sad about Jon's parents! But it's obvious that you came into his life right when he needed you most. :)

Tiff said...

It was nice to read your perspective on Jon's situation. My parents have both passed away, my mom just recently, and while it is difficult, there are so many memories in the pictures and tangible items that I was able to keep. In the future, I can hopefully share these memories and keepsakes with children, so they can learn where they come from.

Alisha said...

You will get to meet again when we're all gathered at Jesus' feet! I think that's precious that you want to have a baby boy for the sake of their relationship! :)

Maybe it's just a Texas thing, but I'm right there with you on our house being protected by God and guns ha!!

Kimberly Erskine said...

I flew to San Diego to marry my husband while he has been stationed at Camp Pendleton for the Marine Corps and as I got my baggage, I learned that my husband's father had passed away that morning. We canceled our California wedding and got married a week later in our homestate instead. It was a really challenging yet uplifting set of circumstances to get married in. I had met Ryan's father the week before and he was this awesome man who had just gone through heart surgery to be their for his own father's funeral (yes, two people in our family passed away only a week apart). I wish I could have spent more time with him and it was really hard on my husband to live so far away from his father and then see him only once before he had passed away due to military obligations. Ryan had difficulties keeping in contact with that side of the family, but then again he doesn't love sending greeting cards like I do. Although I would have loved to have had the opportunity to build a relationship with my father-in-law, I have gotten to know and have been accepted into a great family and I have probably the best set of in-laws a girl could ask for.

I love that your husband was able to hold something so dear as that car. My husband also has a car from his father, a vintage Jeep that they were walking on together. It's something that they'll always have =]

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...