I was thrilled and humbled to write a post for What To Expect giving the short story on Ford's birth and talking about my expectations and emotions around the experience. Earlier this week it was featured on AOL and I got lots of texts, emails, and tweets congratulating me but also apologizing for the comments some readers left. I hadn't ever thought to read them but I spent some time going through them and all I have to say is... grace!!
I am not hurt or offended by some of the comments but more in shock and saddened that women (and men!) view labor and birth as a competitive sport (took that from one of the comments!). At the mere mention of induction, people all the sudden become medical professionals, get on their soap boxes, and rip apart people who didn't have the ideal birth story. Would I have preferred an easy, pain free, vaginal birth... probably.... but that was NOT my story. From the beginning of time the Lord knew my body would hit 41 weeks and have yet to show signs of labor. He knew pitocin would do nothing to progress me and that my blood levels wouldn't allow for an epidural. He knew I would endure pain but come out on the other side praising His name. And I love that! I love that I have an unconventional story to tell. Looking back on life, things have gone pretty good. I broke my back 10 years ago and that's a fun story to tell but other than that, this was my Jesus is real experience. God formed Ford in my womb, God created pitocin, God formed the hands of my wonderful doctor that somehow pulled a 9lb baby out of a tiny incision.
A huge part of me wanted to retaliate with harsh words but honestly what would that do? I did respond to some of the comments but in a way that I hope shows my strength and kind heart. I know everything happens for a divine reason and I won't be ashamed to share it. Now I don't need anyone to feel sorry for me or shower me with praise, what I need is grace. If you push a baby out your lady parts in your bathtub with a midwife or party it up with the nurses while clicking your little epidural...you are a woman who has done an amazing thing. A planned C section or an emergency one...your body is incredible. Blindly making judgment on such a precious event in someone's life isn't doing anything but harden your heart.
Thank you to everyone who did leave little notes and comments that built me up... we are in this together. As women (and parents and humans) we should want nothing but to love each other despite differences in sex, race, religion, birth story.... and respect those differences. Don't be afraid to tell me your awesome birth story, girl you rock!! And please email me if you need a shoulder to cry on because your ideal birth ended in a C section, I'll cry with you.
Grace like rain, friends.
*To clear anything up, lots of comments were made about my choice to induce and ending in a C section. In the state of Texas it is illegal to carry a baby past 42 weeks under doctor's care and y'all saw my belly...there wasn't anywhere else for my 9lb baby to go. Going too much past term brings risks of placenta calcification and loss of amniotic fluid and I would much rather have ended in a C section than risk my son's health. And as far as induction goes... my body did not respond to Pitocin like it should have. I went in at a 4 and was on the highest dose of Pitocin (without an epidural) and 8 hours later was still at a 4.
P.S. someone commented that they saw me out in town when I was pregnant and assumed I was about to have triplets!! LOL!