Wednesday, January 30, 2013

When we decided to start "trying"

Baby Week Day 3!

I put the word trying in quotes because we weren't really trying. I think of actively trying as peeing on ovulation sticks and tracking all that good stuff. We just stopped preventing! 

Throughout the first year of our marriage, we went back and forth on when we wanted to start trying and never really came up with a date. Which I think is healthy. After our 1 year anniversary and buying our first home, we kinda talked about waiting until our 2nd year anniversary or after. We both agreed we didn't want there to be a deadline and we'd pray and follow the Lord's plan for our family. We didn't want to be living our life according to this timeline. We knew we'd never have taken enough trips, slept in enough, have enough money in our savings to satisfy, etc. Is anyone ever really ready for children?

You know those people who say you need to travel and do all these crazy things before you have kids? Well those are usually the people who didn't do that and are regretting it. Am I right?! (for those of you not married or newly married...beware...people get SO opinionated when you get married!). Jon and I took our first trip together after dating 3 months and have traveled since. It is something we feel blessed to be able to do and don’t want it to stop, even when our baby comes. So back to the house, waiting, etc. This past summer we came to the realization that there is never the perfect time! Like I said, you will never have enough experiences under your belt to prepare you for a baby. It is silly to sit here and say this is when we want a baby, this is when we want #2, and so on when we know ultimately it is not our choice.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.-Jeremiah 29:11

Jon will be 30 in April and even though age is just a number, we want a big family and knew we both wanted to be young. We decided that we would pray. We had left our home buying decision in the hands of the Lord and even the start of our relationship in His hands so we prayed for direction (read how God led us to buying our home, here). We said God, we aren't sure if we are physically ready just yet but please guide us down the path of parenthood on your timeclock. We felt spiritually ready as we continued to build the foundation of our family on the covenant we had with God and felt we were both becoming more solid and secure in our faith. My sister had our beautiful niece and Goddaughter on October 1st, 2012 and 2 weeks later, on my birthday, Jon and I decided to get off the pill. You are probably thinking I got baby fever from my niece (which is only partially true!) but it hit us like a ton of bricks. We were asking God for guidance and to fully take the reigns of our family plans yet we were still preventing it 99.9% with birth control. Because this baby (and all babies) are children of God, we wanted Him to choose when we would be parents, or IF we would be parents at all. We vowed that we wouldn't be that couple timing their sex or peeing on ovulation sticks and that we would let the Lord fulfill His plan.  Not to share too much but getting off the pill was the greatest thing for our sex life! It was, and is, so freeing (and fun!). We feel that in giving God our complete trust, He was rewarding us physically. 


What’s crazy is that some people are probably thinking 'well yeah of course you got pregnant a couple weeks after getting off birth control' but that is not our thinking at all. We know that GOD was the one to stir our hearts and make us realize we were trying to take fate into our own hands (by taking the birth control pill). We were meant to get pregnant when we did and have our first child in August 2013. If we wouldn't have listened to the Lord, who knows what would have happened? This baby is a true gift from the work of His hands. 1 Samuel 1:27 couldn't be more true in our livesI prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him.

I plan on sharing my experience with getting off birth control and tell you all the nitty gritty because I was so lost when I got off. I found that there weren’t many resources for symptoms, and boy did I have symptoms. That will definitely be a TMI/ girls only post!

From the day we found out we were pregnant, we have been thanking God for His goodness, faithfulness, and unfailing mercies. Parenthood is not a right, it is a gift and a privilege. I feel so privileged (and blessed) that the Lord has chosen me and Jon to parent one of His children on this earth. Our thanks will never be enough for the gift we will be receiving in August.


Photobucket

33 comments:

Catherine said...

Remembering that He is in charge is so important, this post is a great reminder for me especially, because we have been trying for over two years. I have found it very easy to forget that I'm on His timeline and that nothing is impossible for Him.

Lindsay B. said...

So inspired by you and Jon's trust in the Lord. I love coming to your blog and being filled up with great things! I pray that mine and my fiances marriage will be so God centered as yours!

Gina said...

This is a great post. My husband and I took the same approach. Stop preventing and leave it in the hands of God. We actually got pregnant in less than 3 months too.
It's true - everyone always says I want to travel more, save more, etc. before baby....But are you ever really ready?
Even when I was 9 months pregnant, people would ask "are you ready". My answer was always "as ready as I can be". You never know where life will take you and what will happen around the next corner. You just have to make the best of what happens. We thank God every day that we have a healthy and happy baby because we have friends that haven't had it as "easy" and it really makes you count your blessings.

Lia Joy said...

Ruthie, you genuinely inspire me with your heart for the Lord! Corby and I have talked/prayed long and hard about starting a family. Part of where I fail daily is putting my faith 100% in God and His perfect timing. I'm a control freak and not being able to have control over certain things is difficult for me. I'm thankful for a God who is merciful and still loves me in spite of my shortcomings! Thanks for a post filled with scripture and hope :)

Carolyn said...

YAY!! :) So glad you two decided to start a family!

Jenny said...

I am so inspired by the two of you.

You are right, it is in God's hands and he blessed you when he thought the time was right.

So happy for you!

Bridget said...

Ruthie...I love that you guys trust in the Lord with everything. My husband is very good with that, but I have problems because I figured I can control everything when I know that I can't and don't. I love reading this post and it's very inspirational! Thank you and may God bless you on this incredibly journey!!!

Jessica said...

awe this is so touching!!! I love that you put all your trust in the Lord & I truly agree that it was God's plan for you to have baby #1 in August..I cant wait to keep reading the way God is blessing you & Jon!!

Katie McKenzie said...

wow Ruthie! My husband and I had about the same story! God is in control!!
Katie
godslittlegrace.blogspot.com

Lauren H. Edmondson said...

love this post, my husband and I say all the time that our son Sawyer was kind of a surprise for us, as we hadn't been trying to have a baby, but we know he wasn't a "surprise" for the Lord.We're so glad he blessed us with Sawyer, whether we were planning for him or not!

Allison said...

You two are such an inspirtation & a true example of what god can do in our lives if we let him. My husband and I are giong through the same thoughts, strugle (if I can call it that), and I need to let it go 100% to him. Thank you for sharing and I am looking forward to the next post because that will be me very soon!!

KRISTIN said...

J and I weren't trying but we weren't being the smartest about preventing either and after our little surprise I KNOW that it was 100% God's plan. I didn't think we were ready, I was scared but I was also so relieved and grateful because I didn't know for sure whether or not I could get pregnant. You are so right, there's no way to truly be READY for having a baby, so having faith and letting God decide when you are ready is truly the best way to go.

Lauren {at} Life.Love.Lauren said...

Excellent post! So happy for you both!

Lauren said...

Kids can make traveling more challenging in some ways but it can also be so much more fun!! We have done a fair amount of traveling since Brielle was born and look forward to a year of traveling this year with two in tow. I do think people speak out of regret unfortunately. The way way to live without those is to stop making excuses and if people want to travel they need to just do it.

I am a planner. Completely. I am so guilty of making my own plans that I sometimes am not open enough to what God's plan is. I feel like with our first, we decided to stop preventing and just let God take the reigns thinking it might be a year or more for us... Long story. Yeah, or first try. Meant to be. The second time, we were still preventing when I felt like God spoke to us and said we would get pregnant when we did. We stopped preventing even though it was earlier than we had initially "planned" because we felt like it was supposed to me. Sure enough we got pregnant exactly then. I know I have plans for the next child but I know if we are supposed to have another sooner (or later), God will let us know and we'll just have to trust Him!

Julie Keller said...

Although my friend is about eight months pregnant, and we share basically everything about lives and our bodies with one another, we've never talked about what changed for her when she stopped taking the pill. To be honest, it didn't really occur to me that much would change. I look forward to this post Ruthie.

And I completely agree with you about never being ready for children. Last December my husband and I decided to lift this "Three Year Plan" that we had, and actually enjoy our life now - rather than waiting/saving for that magical time to come. The other night, he actually mentioned that he's surprised how free and relaxed I've been since that talk. I told him it totally changed my world. I love my life a lot more this way, and am less stressed without a deadline being placed on our life!

Mason's Mama said...

Such a great post! I love the faith you two have!

Sarah said...

Ruthie, there is no better way you guys could have gone about making this decision! The Lord reigns in your life, marriage and home and I love reading all about it! I have loved reading your baby posts this week and can't wait for them to continue. You are going to be such an amazing godly mother and I can't wait to see how your story unfolds! Prayers going up for you and that wee blessing you are growing!

Marie H said...

This is exactly what I needed to read right now.

Shalyn said...

Ahhh awesome post love! I can't wait for that BC post! :) I AM SO GLAD THAT YOU ARE HAVING A BABY!!!!! He/She is going to be such a blessing! :) God has a plan for everyone and for when it's their time. I love this story and I LOVE you woman!

Kel kel said...

I'm so happy for you!

People can be really opionated about parenting too. When I became a mom, I became more focused in my decisions and less wishy-washy. I always want to do what is best for me and baby. : )

God bless you little mama!

Kat@shop.school.sleep. said...

I am the opposite I guess, I need a timeline because I am not ready...however, I do agree that no one is ever really ready. I just cannot imagine stop preventing right now in our lives. I am turning 30 in 7 months and the thought of family and kids is weighing on my mind. I want to leave it up to God (and really birth control isn't 100%, so it is still up to him if he wants us to have a baby even if we use birth control)but I would rather put it off for at least a year more so we can "get" ready...example buy a house!!

Jessi Bridges said...

What a testimony to trusting the Lord completely. Not just saying, ok if we are meant to get pregnant we will, even on the pill. He opens and closes wombs in His timing. And we have to be willing to give all of it up to Him. I have so many friends and family with that testimony. Women who were not using BC for a long time and praying and waiting and in His perfect time it happened (and many of them already had children so we know they weren't infertile!). He will continue to bless your obedience to Him in so many ways. I am so thrilled for your family. Cannot wait to meet this baby!!

Bailee said...

I am so glad I found your blog! I do not even remember where I stumbled upon it... I am engaged to be married in July to my best friend of 6 years. I have loved reading over you and your husbands faithful marriage! Congratulations on the baby I can not wait to follow your story!

Heather @ Finding Beauty in the Ordinary said...

love this post... and you guys!! so amazing. such an incredible testimony that you share! i really needed to read this today as the topic of "baby #2" came up! hehe! thanks love! xo

Alicia said...

I'm glad you feel this way. It is truly a gift. My husband and I have been trying for 7 months now. I have a feeling it is not in our plans...I can only keep hoping and dreaming that we will maybe be given a chance to have a family in this life.

Sarah said...

You and Jon are SUCH an inspiration!! You're both such a light in so many people's lives (including all of us readers of your blog!) and I am SO happy God has blessed you with a baby! :)

As far as the "not being ready" ya...you never are! You said it perfectly - you've never traveled enough and saved enough and had enough "just the two of us" time, because there's never enough of that! But ya know what? Babies enhance the relationship and the family dynamic. They truly are a blessing from God.

My husband and I have gotten closer since having Camdyn. Everything we do is for her and our family. Our evenings are spent playing guitar and singing to Camdyn (well John does that) and cuddled up watching movies. It's fun. I love it and wouldn't trade it for the world!

So excited to follow along on your journey!! :)

Brianne Bracco said...

This is an amazing and inspiring read! I feel that my husband and I may be nearing the children crossroads talk soon and reading your experience helps put things in a good perspective. Thank you so much for sharing!

Taylor {and} Scott said...

You're an inspiration. Seriously. I think it is so important to remember God's hand in every aspect of our lives. You little baby will be so blessed to be with you and Jon. You are going to raise an amazing child! I wish you the best with your pregnancy! You're going to be such an adorable mommy!!

CMae said...

Everything you wrote is how my husband and I feel!! We know that there will never be enough money in the bank, or the right "time" to have a kid so hence our recent decision to just let things "be" and all will happen according to God's plan! :)

Kelsey Eaton said...

love this post so much! Love how much you trusted and put your faith in God. :)

Lisa C said...

Just catching up on your blog and feel as though I can really relate to this right now! It's so true that there will always be more things to do, more places to travel more money to save, etc. sometimes you just have to leave it up to Him. I would love to read about your experience in getting off the pill, symptoms etc. as I have been on it for several years and have no idea what to anticipate. Love your blog and I'm excited to read about your pregnancy/baby journey!

Jessica said...

Ruthie! I just stumbled on your blog and I love it. I really hope you write the post about coming off the pill, because I'm probably going to stop soon and would love to hear your experience. I'm definitely a little freaked out based on the little information I've found on the web. My hubby and I are in the same boat as you were. We are just going to stop trying to prevent getting pregnant, not try to get pregnant. XO!

Kimberly Bonham said...

This is such a beautiful post! We have been trying for about 4 months now. We are just trusting in the Lord's perfect timing and perfect plan and we wouldn't want it any other way!!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...