Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Why did this happen?

Time doesn't go by without finding myself asking this question. "Why did this happen?" "Why did that happen?". Whether it be questioning the state of a current friendship, the tragic losses experienced in the Moore tornadoes, or why the heck I lost a $25 Target giftcard I received (true story), as humans we always question.

3 weeks ago today Jon was in a bad car accident. He is 100% fine and no one was injured (nor in the accident with him), but his car was badly damaged. And we still can't wrap our heads around why it happened. Long and scary story short, Jon had to drive to Dallas for a couple of hours to fill in for an executive who couldn't make it to a quick presentation and happy hour. Jon's in software sales and has a certain territory and even though the meeting was in his territory, it didn't benefit him one bit. So he had to spend 6 hours in the car round trip for this meeting and he sucked it up. We were on the phone while he is heading Southbound on I-35 and all of the sudden he starts yelling "I don't know what's going on! Oh my God! What is happening." Click. And my heart sank. Jon saw a brush fire in the distance and a car in the shoulder so he moved to the left lane to pass by. The next thing he knew, there was a thick cable jumping over the median, flailing, and it hooked onto his bumper, tore through it, tore through his radiator, tore through his brake line, and did incredible amounts of damage to practically every panel of the car. Oh and I should mention... this car was 2 weeks old. Jon spent months researching and finally bought a new (to us) car that he was so excited about. Thank God for modern car technology and his E brake helping him get to the shoulder but what an experience. And this was the day before we left for vacation.

I was able to talk to Jon just a bit in the midst of police reports, towing, driving back to Dallas, and insurance claims. And when we finally got the chance to really talk the next morning, I was in full tears telling him how happy I was. Yes the situation sucked and still sucks, but we saw so much of God's grace through the accident. Knowing how scary it was for Jon, I can't imagine having stayed calm in the situation so it is a blessing I wasn't with him. God protected Jon by not allowing the cable to rip through his windshield and hurt him. Nor was anyone around him (he was on I35 going 60mph so could have easily been hit). And by the grace of God, we hadn't had the chance to sell Jon's old car so he can drive it until the repair on his car is made (which I have to say will take 4 weeks, $11k in damage, 56 hours of paint and body work, and it's still in Dallas... thank God again... for insurance)

So it's been a few weeks, we've had time to relax on the beach, digest the information, and move on but we still can't wrap our heads around why this happened. But isn't that how life should be? We constantly feel entitled to the whole truth which is really like saying, "God we don't trust that this was for our good, so tell us why it happened". Jon said the whole night, as he's interacting with people who stopped, cops, etc, he kept asking God, "am I supposed to meet this person? Will they change my life". We seem to always want a quick and easy answer to things in our lives... especially things that cause pain and damage. And sometimes we are lucky enough to get those answers! I know I was meant to be hurt in relationships prior to Jon to prepare my heart for a marriage I could only dream of. Or that I was laid off from my job a week before my wedding only to find a sense of purpose, excitement, and fun in my current job. We are quick to blame God on the pain in our lives and too impatient to wait for truth and understanding in His plans. 

Do I think that because of this car accident, something huge and drastic will forever be changed in our lives? No. But I know God was teaching us something through this. I am not quite sure what it is but I know He loves seeing the praise we are giving for Jon's safety rather than blame for Jon's car. Is it easy? Not always. Of course it sucks that we are out our insurance deductible and the car will probably be ready right when I am delivering our baby... but the mercy He showed on us is so much greater than those things... so much greater. 

My prayer is that I prepare to enter motherhood, I can continue seeing God's grace and mercy in the tough times. I know there will be days, many days, where I question my success as a mother, wife, or friend, yet what a gift to have the unfailing, steadfast, overflowing love, support, and encouragement from the Lord. I pray that I can be patient when problems arise and less demanding of trying to understand God's will. And I pray these things for you too.

29 comments:

Kaleigh said...

My husband and I were robbed Monday afternnon while at work. Sure, it's just stuff and we thank God that we are all ok but it's hard to not ask "why"

Karla said...

Ruthie, I so admire your strength and faith in God. I don't always comment, but today I just needed to say that I really needed to read this today. Thank you. =)

Carolyn said...

OH MY GOODNESS! I can only imagine how scary that was for both of you! Thank goodness he ended up safe!

Cori @ Everyday Enchanted said...

I'm so thankful that Jon wasn't hurt! I know we are always so quick to ask why, but I love that verse that says, "His ways are better than our ways".

Megan Reinbold said...

Beautiful post. Thank you for sharing. I'm so glad that Jon is OK. You two are such an amazing example of faith and a pure love of God.

Melissa A said...

This is exactly what I needed to read today. Its so easy for us to ask why when things aren't going right in our lives and I needed to be reminded that i need to just trust that these things are a part of his plan for me and he has a purpose behind everything good or bad.

What a scary thing you guys went through. I'm glad everything turned out ok!!

Candice Williams said...

Honestly your blog makes me so happy. You are an amazing godly woman and it is such a blessing to read the insight you have!

michelle said...

that is so scary! i am so glad that jon is okay. cars are replaceable but people are not.

Courtney Kassner said...

Thank you, thank you for this post. This was exactly what I needed to read today. I'm even writing some of it down as a daily reminder to myself as my husband and I are waiting to see God's plan for this next phase in our lives. Thank you!

Holly Perkins said...

Wow, very scary Ruthie! I'm glad Jon is okay! Thanks again for a beautiful post!

Carly said...

I'm so glad he is OK!!! And I love this, will be keeping it in mind as I get closer to having my baby!

Carly
www.lipglossandcrayons.com

Allison said...

Wow. I am so glad he and everyone else is ok. What a scary, freak accident. Your faith amazes me and I believe that everything is within gods plan for our lives.

Lisa Champlin said...

I am not a religious person whatsoever, but every time I read a post like this of yours, it really gets me thinking. This one even made me a bit teary.

Peach State of Mind said...

Ruthie -
You're such an inspiration. I found your blog yesterday, and I haven't been able to stop reading your posts. I love your strength, courage and love for God. I can't wait to read more and watch how you grow even more as a mother. :)

Claire Beeks said...

That experience sounds terrifying, Ruthie. So sorry that you all had that happen, especially right before vacation. This is a great reminder that we truly are not in control sometimes, and to appreciate each and every second we spend with our family/friends. So glad everyone is OK :)

Meghan said...

How terrifying for him and for you Ruthie! Thank God he's okay! I'm sure you were very grateful to have that vacation time afterward to reflect and relax together.

Christelle said...

How scary!!! So thankful Jon is okay!

Once again, I'm totally amazed at the way you both choose to look at situations. I've been struggling with a "why did this happen" question for quite sometime now and I'm slowly (so slowly) starting to see it's getting me absolutely NO WHERE. My faith has faltered but I'm thankful to have find your blog and see your walk in Christ, it's a great example for me. Thank you for sharing this post today; you are one wise lady, Ruthie. (sorry for the long comment)

akupofkatie said...

I'm so very proud of you. You most certainly WILL question yourself and God but you've got a strong foundation, little mama. You are in for one heck of a ride but the journey is life changing! Your wisdom and trust in God will save you. I love how you ended this post. Powerful last statement that STICKS. Good writing friend!!!

Erin LFF said...

Always the inspiration :) Thanks for always having such an uplifting blog girl!!

Erinn C.D. said...

I was in a bad accident on Monday where I was forced to swerve to avoid a car, ended up losing control and bouncing off of the guardrail at 70 mph to end up facing interstate traffic the wrong way. The person who caused it drove off and I just kept saying on scene "who doesn't even stop?" To the total shock of all the first responders, I came out of it practical unscathed except for some neck and upper back injuries. My personality makes it easy to move on from stuff but I'll be going to counseling because I don't want to ask the "what ifs" or "why did this happen to me". I'm so overwhelmed with the positivity of the situation that I'm not feeling it now but it could definitely come up.
I'm so sorry about your husband's car :( Ours was our first purchase as a married couple and given how well it protected me, it'll always be my favorite car. I'm practically a walking ad for Honda Fit's now :)

Cassie @ Live.Laugh.L0ve. said...

Oh my gosh, so scary! I am SO glad to hear he is okay! Better the car be messed up than him! He definitely had an angel watching over him.

Lauren said...

I think there are so many things that will always been open-ended in the way that we don't know what their exact purpose was but we do know that we learned SOMETHING for it. I just have the mentality that no matter what happens, no matter what changes in my life and whether it SEEMS good or bad that one thing IS constant - God is good. I know this to be true with every ounce of my being and as long as that is true, that is what I will press into. There are so many questions that may or may not be answered for us, but as long as I come back to that place of "God is good", I think I'll be okay.

Tonya said...

Oh my goodness...how scary!!! I bet his adrenaline was flowing! At least it happened with him alone and not with you in the car or after you delivered with the baby in the car. His timing is always perfect!

The Truth About Tomi said...

You and Jon have truly become my role models because of this very idea. My tendency to overreact and freak out is something that I have really been trying to work on. And to have you as my sister and supporting me the whole time letting me know everything is going to be okay, makes it so much easier! Love you and thanks for sharing!

Glad Jon, you, and Baby Hart are safe!

Wifessionals said...

Great post love! I have seen this so many times in my own life - even though in the midst of the trying times I don't understand what God is doing. I liked that you said the thing about experiencing hurtful relationships before Jon...That happened with me and now it makes me appreciate my "fairytale" marriage even more so. I just can't believe I was blessed with such an amazing husband and one that was so perfect for me (:

Sarah at Midwest Pillowtalk said...

i just want to hug you. all the time.
youre wonderful.
im glad jon is okay and im thankful you shared this with us
xxo

Heather Leigh said...

I had a dream about you the other night! I gave you a big hug. I only wish now I could do that in person. :) I totally feel you here girl. when I was 42 weeks pregnant both my husband and I were in a car accident. The car hit my side of the car and was soo close to actually hitting my door. No body was hurt. Thank God! He was really looking out for us. That was one out of three car accidents we had in three months. Some would say it was "The Lords will" For stuff like this to happen and that he's trying to teach us a lesson. But I couldn't disagree more with that statement. I believe things like this is a direct attack from the devil himself trying to steal our joy and thankfulness. But when we give it all to God He lovingly takes a horrible situation that the devil intended for bad and God can take it and turn it into good for His glory. We had two totaled cars in 3 months and one scratched up one. But every time God found a way to make it all better! Be blessed girl and I'm so glad Jon's okay!

Krista said...

Oh my goodness, I'm so happy to hear that Jon is safe! I can't imagine how scary that must have been for both of you. I have to say that I do the same thing all the time....asking God what am I suppose to learn from this? And I always think the answer will show up immediately. But I know God's timing doesn't always work that way. Thank you for sharing your experiences with this same issue and encouraging everyone to keep their trust rooted in the Lord even when no answers seem apparent.

themosbysinchina said...

SO glad Jon is okay. I love that phrase "We constantly feel entitled to the whole truth." That's so true. So so true. And you're right, that's exactly us saying we don't trust you God..Great post Ruthie. Thank you for trusting the Lord, and praising Him, and sharing it, it's an encouragement and reminder of how good and worthy He is of all our trust and all our praise.

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