Here's another article from The Knot that I found interesting!! No plans for baby Hart just yet but that doesn't mean we aren't discussing it! I feel like Jon and I have been talking about so many of the topics below recently.
Below are articles from TheKnot.com that I have talked about in previous posts
- 10 things to buy now that you'll keep forever
- 15 things to do before you have kids
- The 10 biggest fitness mistakes that are making you fat
So what does TheKnot.com say you need to chat about before having kiddos? I've listed the hot topics below in BOLD with the explanation following (from the website). I have added my comments in RED (remember red=Ruthie).
1. Public school or private school? What kind of school experience do you want for your kid, how much are you willing to pay for it and how will those (staggering) expenses change your financial options? How much will you sock away for college? If one of you insists on private school, does that mean that you, say, buying a smaller house?
I've gone to public school my entire life and Jon went to public up until college where he attended a private Baptist school in Waco, Baylor University. We are moving in a matter of 2 months and have decided on a neighborhood in a great school district. Public school is the plan until our children choose where to go to college. We'd also love to send our kiddos to a Christian pre-school.
2. If it’s a girl, your partner wants to name her Rainbow. Can you get past this? Kidding. Not every detail needs to be hashed out and talked to death. Baby names are something that every couple somehow manages to work out; don’t sweat it. Unless the name is actually Rainbow
We actually have our baby names picked out! If you know me personally then I have probably already told you :-). And no, our daughter will not be named Rainbow Hart
3. How will you fund Project Baby? Babies come with a magical power: They make your every nickel disappear. Cribs! Diapers! Postnatal care! A tricked-out Bugaboo stroller with a built-in Blu-ray player! These little creatures have the gall to ask for food too. Make a realistic financial plan and leave some leeway for the unexpected.
Okay we don't even have a TV in our bedroom so there is no way our baby will be watching Blu-rays in their crib. Jon and I are both insured with his company and have a joint HSA account. We actually contribute monthly in addition to what is provided by his company, so that by the time we have our first baby, pre natal care and hospital bills will already be paid for. If your company has this option, do it! It is pre taxed money. As far as other baby expenses go, we are pretty good savers and smart with our money. We have some time to think about that.
4. How many kids will you have? Maybe you dream of just one little angel and your partner wants a 15-baby platoon that doubles as a reality TV star. This one variable -- number of kids -- will have more impact on the dynamic of your family than almost anything else.
I am 1 of 4 kids and Jon is an only child! We have an idea of how many we want but we will see what God has planned for us.
Maybe we will be the next Duggars! JK
5. How will your careers change? How long (if at all) does Mom stay at home? How about Dad? Are you okay (really okay) with the financial and career trade-offs?
We have a plan for this one too...stay tuned ;-)
6. Who’s on diaper duty? How will you carve up the parental duties? True, this is the kind of thing that tends to work itself out, but you should have a sense of who does what. Will you both split everything or are there distinct Dad Duties and Mom Duties? Do you take turns waking up at 2 a.m.? (And 3 a.m. And 4 a.m. And 5 a.m....)
Is this even a question?! Both of us! Jon is going to be such a wonderful dad and assures me he will be a diaper changing, bottle feeding, baby swaddling maniac.
7. What about God? This is (obviously) crucial for partners with different religious backgrounds (do you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah or a hybrid?). But it can still be an issue even within the same faith. Will your family go to church, synagogue or another place of worship? How big a role do you want religion to play in your children’s lives? Prayers before dinner?
This is big for us and we are lucky that we both share the same faith and commitment to our faith. Helping our children build a relationship with Jesus is #1 for us. It has also been important for Jon and me to build a Christian foundation in our marriage and household before we decide to expand our family. We would be lost without our faith and our children will definitely grow up in the church.
8. How will you handle Grandma and Grandpa? Let’s say that Grandma and Grandpa want to stay in your home for eight weeks to “help.” Is that good news or bad news? How much will they influence your own style of parenting? How much is Grandma allowed to spoil them? Discipline them? Speaking of which...
Luckily my mom and dad live a mere 15 minutes away from us in Austin! I can't wait to share motherhood with them and have them be a part of our children's lives. There is no way my parents would want to stay 8 weeks with us because they have a better social life than I do!!